The Flow of Energy: Are You Giving More Than You Receive?
Lessons from Tai Chi, Teaching, and the Art of Sustainable Exchange
Hi everyone and happy Monday,
Lately, I’ve been thinking about energy return. About how much we expend and how much we receive back—and how, when that balance is off, we start to feel it in our bodies and minds.
Barbara Houseman talks about the forwards and backwards circle, an idea she draws from Tai Chi and Qi Gong, where the body and nervous system function at full capacity by leaning into movement rather than resisting or conserving. In classical Tai Chi, this is often understood through "reeling silk" (chan si jin)—a continuous, spiraling flow of energy—or through peng and lu, two core principles describing the balance of expanding forward and yielding back. When applied to communication, it highlights how much of life is an exchange of energy.
Some days, I feel in sync with the people around me. Maybe both of us are moving forward, momentum building between us like an easy rhythm. Other days, I notice the contrast—one person surging forward while the other leans back, holding, waiting. A conversation can feel effortless or like it’s taking something from you. Some people, some situations, even some weeks, feel like they ask so much more than they return.
Lately, I’ve been questioning: Where in my life am I not receiving the same energy I give? And how much does that impact my ability to sustain myself through the week?
In teaching, I see this play out all the time. A room full of students, each with their own energy patterns—some reaching out, engaging fully, others quietly absorbing. And I know when I push forward without feeling anything meet me back, it’s exhausting. In voice work, we talk about breath as something reciprocal—inhaling to receive, exhaling to express. Without the inhale, there is no voice.
Maybe the trick is recognizing when we’re pushing out too much without taking enough in. Maybe the trick is making small adjustments—turning towards the places where energy does come back. The conversations that restore us, the work that feels reciprocal, the moments where we are met rather than left waiting.
So this week, I’m choosing to notice. To let peng and lu, this cycle of movement, be a guide. To pay attention to where energy flows easily, and where it sticks. And to lean into the places where return feels right.
M x